Daily Blog #15 – Is Shaming the New Hating?

Remember hating? Of course you do, it still exists. It’s where unpopular opinions or criticisms are considered to be “hating”. For example:

“I don’t watch ‘Scandal'”? “You’re a hater!”
“I don’t like Beyoncé?” “You’re a hater!”

*sigh* We need new words!!

Well, just when I thought we couldn’t jump down the hater hole any further, “shaming” reared it’s little head. Yup, we’ve discovered another word to address someone that has voiced an unpopular opinion or criticism. This time, it’s geared toward a person or a group of people that possess a certain trait or perform certain activities.

For example, if you say, “Strippers are whores”, you’ve now just shamed strippers because we alllll know not all strippers are whores. Some are very nice women that need to make a living to support their families (heyyy Amber) or pay their way through medical school (so many TV shows/movies use this idea).

Shaming, according to uhmm, er, the people that like to make a stink talk about it, feel that it’s a form of bullying. And in this day and age where bullying has gone amuck, we can’t afford to let others feel ashamed of who they are/what they do. I get it. Makes sense. But here’s my thing, when did we get to this place of not being able to share honest opinions about, well, anything?

Seriously, are we getting to the point where we pretty much have to keep all of our opinions to ourselves for fear we’ll be labeled a hater or a shamer? {Random fact: My phone does not autocorrect ‘hater’ but does so for ‘shamer’. Interesting.} And before you say no, really think about it. For example:

If I say, stripping isn’t a respectable job, what would you say? Your first thought (these days), is to say that I’m shaming strippers. But I would say that most people would agree with me because it’s a fact. It’s clearly not respectable, because if it were:

1) There wouldn’t be any stigmas out there about doing it.

2) More women and men would do it if it were respectable, like say being a teacher or a doctor.

In this case, I don’t feel like I’m shaming anyone because I’ve stated facts. If someone is stating facts, why is this shaming?

Let’s try this: If I were to say, “Strippers are hoes. They come from broken homes.” This isn’t fact, it’s an opinion. But apparently, opinions are shaming too, right?

I’m merely trying to figure out, when did discussing facts (or sharing opinions) become such a bad thing in our society? It’s like we’re slowly, but surely getting to a place where we have to monitor, or withhold our thoughts, for fear we’ll be a shamer or hater. That’s pretty sad, right? Who wants to do that?

I’m not really going anywhere with this post. I was just writing to bring up something that I’ve been seeing lately. I guess I’ll just say that most times, when we share our thoughts, we don’t mean any real harm by them. We’re not trying to bully anyone. We’re not trying to make anyone feel some sort of way. Of course, not everyone falls into this category. There are people that try to intentionally hurt others, which is terrible obviously.

But I think the whole shaming/hating thing is getting out of hand. Essentially, if we can’t voice our opinions (or state facts), then how do we discuss…well, anything? Do we only have conversations with just our closest friends? It’s like, we all have to mind our Ps and Qs ALL the time. That’s not real life, is it? I don’t know. I’m just rambling around in my thoughts.

What are your thoughts? I promise not to hate or shame you 🙂

 

-t

 

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